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fighty and flighty
Feb. 19th, 2011 12:46 pmlast week was pressweek, which always makes it hard to sustain conversations or develop ideas: even so, i appear to have wanted to start several arguments which i then had no taste to return to, even to see how they were turning out
one went nowhere at all and the thread has reached auto-closure; one led to a not very satisfying but extended discussion; one is about proportional representation ffs and the obvious insanity of returning to it is i hope going to dissuade me from dong so; one is on-going and will i hope actually help me write a RECORD REVIEW blimey;
anyway the content is relatively unimportant in most of them: what leaves me a bit despondent is the lurch from "MUST GO TO WAR ABOUT THIS NAOW YEAH" to next morning's "CAN'T BRING SELF EVEN TO CARE HOW PPL TOOK MY INTERVENTION"
Now partly i do think this is an artefact of the weird state of mind a magazine deadline can bring, when you are simultaneously tired, adrenalised, jaded, hyper-alert for error, attuned to creative last-minute problem-solving, frantic for distraction yet basically very busy, and geared towards triage (meaning the point where you are choosing between problems to solve on deadline, and decide, of this or that problem, "let it go").
But partly I think it has always been my temperament: I take up projects with great intensity, but I have a completion allergy, and find unconscious ways to dodge away before I reach that stage -- and also in some moods get a significant sense of dread, of even opening a document (let alone a thread i've been misbehaving on).
one went nowhere at all and the thread has reached auto-closure; one led to a not very satisfying but extended discussion; one is about proportional representation ffs and the obvious insanity of returning to it is i hope going to dissuade me from dong so; one is on-going and will i hope actually help me write a RECORD REVIEW blimey;
anyway the content is relatively unimportant in most of them: what leaves me a bit despondent is the lurch from "MUST GO TO WAR ABOUT THIS NAOW YEAH" to next morning's "CAN'T BRING SELF EVEN TO CARE HOW PPL TOOK MY INTERVENTION"
Now partly i do think this is an artefact of the weird state of mind a magazine deadline can bring, when you are simultaneously tired, adrenalised, jaded, hyper-alert for error, attuned to creative last-minute problem-solving, frantic for distraction yet basically very busy, and geared towards triage (meaning the point where you are choosing between problems to solve on deadline, and decide, of this or that problem, "let it go").
But partly I think it has always been my temperament: I take up projects with great intensity, but I have a completion allergy, and find unconscious ways to dodge away before I reach that stage -- and also in some moods get a significant sense of dread, of even opening a document (let alone a thread i've been misbehaving on).
